Couples Therapy for Everyone
Marriages are complex things. When two different people choose to spend most of their time together, sharing both their triumphs and their setbacks, some amount of friction is basically unavoidable.
What makes the difference between a happy relationship and one that ends in disaster is not denying that this tension exists or stubbornly refusing to handle it, but in dealing with the issues that are certain to arise in an open and constructive manner. If this isn't done, apparently trivial disagreements can eventually escalate to incredible proportions.
Learning to Love
In a sense, there is a technique to building a strong relationship, just as there is to driving a golf ball or treating an ulcer. Knowing how to get along with another person for the next several decades isn't necessarily something we're born with – but it is something that everyone can learn.
While skimming through a few books may be helpful, the fact of the matter is that every couple is a special case, and what is true in one marriage may just not apply to another. This is why seeing a qualified relationship counselor can have enormous benefits: by applying their knowledge and experience to your particular situation, they may be able to point out developing problems that you're not even aware of, as well as showing you ways to avoid minor annoyances from spiraling out of control.
Leaving Things too Late
However much we may wish it were otherwise, conflicts in relationships don't always fade away with time, but often fester and start to pile up one on top of the other.
One of the most common professional complaints of relationship counselors is that couples only seriously start thinking about putting out the fire once the house is well aflame. It's a myth that couples therapy is only useful when a marriage is on the rocks: a relationship can benefit from counseling even while it is going strong. In particular, seeing a counselor before marriage has been proven to lead to marriages that are more likely to stand the test of time.
The Benefits of Online Couples Therapy
Even when you recognize the value of seeing a counselor together, you may still hesitate for any of a number of reasons. Nobody needs to have the neighbors gossip about the state of their relationship, while the sheer cost of visiting a licensed therapist might be better spent elsewhere.
Fortunately, there is now a much more convenient option available in the form of sites like BetterHelp.com, a website that connects qualified counselors with people who might otherwise have difficulty in seeing a couples’ therapist. Counseling can be completely anonymous – you might not want to talk about your most private feelings with a stranger, but this is likely to be easier if you'll never even meet the person.
In practical terms, you will usually communicate with your therapist through text messages, allowing you to write down your thoughts whenever you choose, from any device capable of connecting to the internet. Counselors working through this service are all licensed by the state in which they live, while research has shown that online therapy is generally just as effective as meeting with a therapist in a face to face setting.